It's been a rough couple of days. Did I have the power to alter the outcomes that have been so graciously handed to me? Possibly. I'm not sure what I could have done differently, but I bet there was something. I'm not going to beat myself up about it, though. I've got enough healing to do as it is.
I think people can see my transgression and it ties my stomach into knots. I can't seem to shake my desire to vomit. And I can't seem to find the energy to be angry. I just am not that person.
At least I have a sense of humor about things. I've spent the past few days with friends, laughing hysterically to the point of tears. Case and point:
Ashlee: "God, I feel like shit. Today sucks.
Me: "Well, at least you didn't, like, get raped.
Ashlee: "Well, at least you got some!"
Me: "Dude, how do you expect me to get off if you're playing fucking Rockem Sockem Robots with my vagina?"
I'm attending a live sporting event today. I don't understand the object of the game or why it's being played, but I'll cheer the best I can.
You're recycling lines. I thought you were better than that.
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