Tuesday, February 24, 2009

rabbit fur coat.


One week from this very moment I will be sitting in a mansion house in Plano, Texas.

I received a 23 cent raise today. A complete waste of paperwork, if you ask me.

Even though I drive past it every now and then, today I paid a special visit. I parked across the street and stood in front of a foreign fence encasing a familiar plot of land. A house once stood there. A house was condemned there. I grew up there. I remember the old lady who lived to the right of us, with the red kitchen. She was always locking herself out of her house. She always said we looked like movie stars.And I remember the alcoholic butcher who lived to the left of us. I'm certain that if I were to dig through the earth, I would find a bullet or two, aimed out of my mothers drugged disillusionment. I can still imagine the overgrown weeds, the sea of cats and the oxidized swing set.

I wanted to trespass on what was once mine, but opted against it in fear of being arrested.

I am very distracted. So distracted in fact, that I consciously neglected to acknowledge something/someone/ some feeling. It's truly an amazing feat.

I have the day off tomorrow and am already overwhelmed with nervous energy. I just don't want to disappoint anyone, because I fear it's what I've become good at.

Dōmo arigatō, Mr. Roboto

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