"Powdered sugar and battery acid."

I'm not sure where to begin with Chicago, as my adventure was rather anti-climatic.

My bus ride there was enjoyable. I spent the entire trip talking to a 60 year old woman about life and what not. I received some advice and offered some in return. We hugged each other when we departed. I realized I can have lengthy conversations without cursing.

Big cities are seemingly less romantic when you spend your time walking in the cold rain alone, fighting the wind, wondering how you got to where you are.

Chicago is pretty easy to navigate. I followed my map to everywhere and nowhere. The only people that are nice to you are the people who are paid to. It's hard to light a cigarette in the windy city.

My hotel mates were very sweet. They invited me every time they left, but I politely declined as to not intrude on their vacation. I traveled there alone, so I figured I might as well commit and do everything on my own.

I shared a ride in the hotel elevator with two scantily clad transvestites. They had parties every night. They were only two rooms away from us. I wanted nothing more than to party with them.

Chicago fog is intense. The tops of buildings disappear. It was apocalyptic.

As for the "opportunity", the sole reason I went in the first place...it went well. They're interested in me and would ideally like to see me move there come autumn. The meeting was roughly an hour and a half long. She took a few measurements and asked a series of scattered and at times random questions. She hates that I have tattoos and asked me to consider removing them, I agreed but will not consider it. My hair color is all wrong, she said. "It's the same shade as rust." She said that I'm an actress. The conversation always came back to the discussion of passion. After being asked to list the things I am passionate about, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Of all the things I mentioned, all of which made my heart flutter just by saying them out loud, I failed to say anything involving the reason I was sitting in that office talking to that woman about a life I thought I wanted.

I suppose my time spent in Chicago can best be summarized by the following two events:

1. Hungry and in search of pizza that was not of the deep dish variety, I walked a few blocks and stumbled on a place that would feed my craving. I ordered a small pizza and decided to eat in. When my order was ready, they included on my plate one pizza, two plates and two forks. It was actually quite funny.

2. On my way to Navy Pier (I never actually made it), while attempting to cross the street, a man stops me and the following exchange of words took place:
Homely looking man with a thick accent: Oh my god. You are so beautiful.
Me: (ignore)
Homely looking man with thick accent: Your hair. So beautiful.
Me: Um, thank you.
Homely looking man with thick accent: You are so, so beautiful.
Me: Okay. (Made second attempt to cross the street)
Homely looking man with thick accent: Listen. I'm going to the bank...
Me: Awesome. Have fun!
Homely looking man with thick accent: I'll get money. We could have sex....all night long. All night.
Me: That is a truly tempting offer, sir, but I must be going.

On the bus ride home just before settling in for a cat nap I saw the Oscar Mayer Wiener Mobile speed past my window. I thought I was dreaming, but nope. Just another illustration of my strange, strange trip.

I was mistaken for a party of two and a prostitute. That was my time in Chicago, a truly unforgiving city. Well, at least it was this time around.

I only think of you when I'm vacuuming. I'm not sure if there's any significance to that, but I like to think that there's a reason as to why that chore brings about thoughts of you. It could be the consistent humming that drums up such imaginary conversations and regrets. Perhaps it's the concept of "sucking." That's probably it.

Although I have a great deal of thinking to think about thinking about, everything is simply wonderful. Things are coming together at a snails pace, but it's coming together.

I went out of my way to smell the flowers and to chase a butterfly today. It's those little things. It's always the little things.