It's getting better all the time
This heart's on fire

I had to take one for the team. And when I say team, I mean me. I thought at the time what I was doing was a complete mistake, little did I know that my choice was pure genius. GENIUS! I threw him off my trail, once and for all. Conversation resumed naturally and greedy hands returned to familiar positions underneath my shirt.

"Hands to yourself." I said.
"Come on." he pleaded.
I shook my head sheepishly.
Only a few gentle minutes passed before it started again and I refused him again.
"So, are we done here?" he asked.
"I suppose we are."

Buying me a slice of mediocre apple pie doesn't give you admission to pants paradise. All you'll get is a thank you and a prudish goodbye. Hmph!

Job hunting is so bothersome.

I was almost late for work due to masturbation.

I have $3 to my name. I had $5, but I bought a milkshake.

I finally know what I want to be when I grow up. Legit as fuck.

Now, if you don't mind, please allow me to step away from this dreadful play and take my rightful place at the end of the stage to perform my winded, over thought, unrehearsed aside. Spotlight? (clears throat):

"I'm not sure you pay attention to this thing anymore, but seeing that my options are limited, this couldn't hurt. This may all be a complete oversight of something minuscule, but I would be a complete idiot to let this go unnoticed. I've had to fight for very few things in my life, but my previous battles seem so unimportant now that I'm willing to fight for this; whatever this is or isn't. I'm assuming your answers and explanations are true because I have no reason not to believe you. So, assuming the former, I must tell you how completely crazy you sound. However, I see where you're coming from because if I had made the choice to make a clean break, my explanation would be identical to yours. The possibility of being hurt is the most frightening thing; I would know because I anticipate it, too, upon meeting people I could potentially care about. But I am not in the business of hurting people. I remember the moment I realized I was invested, in some small way in you. I made a phone call upon reading a message you sent my way. I was overcome with fear that you may have been hurt. But the reassurance of your voice calmed my nerves and awakened something I had been looking for. To cut the shit (which I'm not very good at, I'm afraid) I want you and have wanted you for quite some time. And as pathetic as it may sound to you or anyone else, I don't see these feelings fading any time soon. I can't dispose of this as easily as you can and have. I really, truly, want you.And I'm not exaggerating when I say that it would be my greatest pleasure to be wanted by you, too.

[exit stage left]

And yes, world, I have lost my fucking mind.