my hair was extremely greasy.
I then tried to recall the last time I showered.
After a few moments, I realized I could not remember.
Therefore, I have concluded that it has been 4-8 days
since my last shower.
My mind wanders.
Having said that, I have now made a bathing schedule.
I don't make schedules for schoolwork or events, etc.
But I've somehow deemed scheduling necessary for
when I need to bathe myself.
Needless to say, Thursday (today) is on my schedule.
"There's nothing sadder than wedding dresses in Salvation Army windows."
I wrote that today.
I'm not sure why.
Sometimes I think I want something to be wrong with me.
I think I want more problems so I seem interesting.
I watched a woman on t.v giving birth and she was making
the most amazing faces and noises ever.
Her eyes bugged out and she sounded like she was pleasuring herself.
Kelly: Ew. Look at the umbilical cord.
Me: That's disgusting.
Kelly: Did you know that there's a sack that comes out after you give birth?
Me: Yeah. You're supposed to eat it.
Kelly: Seriously? I rather eat the baby.
I want a boyfriend for the sole purpose
of having someone to feed me.
Not physically feed me (I actually find that disgusting)
but to pay for food whenever I want it.
I'm not sure thats a requirement of boyfriend duties,
but I assume if I keep my candy shop open, the least he
can do is buy me a fucking whopper.
I am single, by the way.
Very, very single.
I wonder why....?
(Perhaps it's my lack of bathing or my constant desire for food
or my fascination with sacks of afterbirth)
Happy Birthday, Whoopi Goldberg.
You chocolate goddess, you.
Wow.
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